Your Honor

HAVING BEEN PREVIOUSLY ARRESTED AND CONVICTED MORE THAN A DOZEN TIMES for crimes ranging from drunk driving to theft-by-deception and armed robbery, our protagonist is finally convicted in U.S. District Court of conspiracy to commit mail fraud and sentenced to five years in federal prison. Case closed, end of story. So lock him up and be done with it, you say? Ahh, were it only so simple ... See, the U.S. Parole Board, in its infinite wisdom, granted the moron's request for parole, whereupon the moron violated the terms thereof by absconding (how could he resist?) and a nationwide warrant was issued for his arrest as a fugitive. Join this somewhat-less-than criminal mastermind and the ladies he weds on the run -- and provides for by conning small businessmen out of their hard-earned cash and scamming fast-food from restaurants in order to survive -- while traveling from coast to coast and hiding out in Denver, San Jose, Albuquerque, Minneapolis, Chicago and New York City. It was a really great ride while it lasted! This is a true story of life on the run from the law. As such, it is serious in nature, but also laugh-out-loud funny, at times...depending on which side of the law you're on, of course: )