Kill Your Idols

Congratulations! You are the owner of an authentic Idol from The American Idol Company. This Idol was made for the sole purpose of worship and reverence in exchange for blessings and protection. To use this Idol in any other way could result in damage, injury, and/or the cancellation of warranty. We at The American Idol Company wish you success and satisfaction in your spiritual journey. In an America where militias, doomsday cults and self proclaimed Prophets are as commonplace as gas stations and fast food restaurants, The American Idol Company is born. Operating under the belief that scandal and controversy will increase sales, the company founders manage to insult everyone from the Pope to the Ayatollah, inspire a generation, and come dangerously close to starting World War 3. "A hilarious, fantastic and crazy adventure that had me forgetting Douglas Adams is no longer with us!" ---Robert S. Wilson, Bram Stoker Award-nominated editor and author of the Empire of Blood and Ray Garret/Lifeline series.