Bøger af Bill Kilpatrick

It's the 21st Century but people are still coming to Florida, and getting eaten by alligators. How does that keep happening? Comedian Bill Kilpatrick explores this issue, giving it all the reverence it deserves. Bill also discusses why it's happening and what to do if you end up with your arm in a gator's mouth. This is not a book for church ladies or lizard people. Bill doesn't want to hear from you if you offend easily or if you're smarter and better educated. He gets both reactions at home from his wife. This book is for people like Bill, who just want to laugh a little at life's folly, people who have a sense of humor, people who can afford to buy this book.This book is not a textbook. It is not required in any class. It does, surprisingly, contain actual facts, statistics, arguments, suggestions and other high-minded features that would make it the perfect book for that friend or loved-one who doesn't have a stick up their butt but appreciates a friendly, educational word-to-the-wise about how to avoid getting eaten by a gator.This book is not for animal trainers, animal rights' advocates or animals. While parts of the book are genuinely educational (if you squint) most of it is for entertainment. If you read it and don't like it, it probably means you suck.It's the 21st Century. We're all reasonably educated people. But somehow, some of us are getting eaten by alligators. It's enough to make you avoid the state of Florida during mating season - or at least alligator mating season. How can you, personally, avoid having this happen to you, or someone you love, or someone your wife doesn't know you love? How can you not end up at the bottom of a Florida lake, bloated like you were when you got off the Keto diet, and treated like a gator's special stash? Read this book right now. Read it as fast as you can. Your life may depend on it and, frankly, I need the sale.

There's no one way to tell a joke. Some comics tell one-liners. Some tell stories. Some like to riff on the news or go confessional. Comedian Bill Kilpatrick looks at observational comedy, which laughs at the oddities of daily life. This book looks at the heart of observational comedy, what it is, how it works, what it shares with other comedic forms and what makes it unique. The purpose of this book is to help comics write better observational material.

When it comes to jokes, size doesn't matter. Some of the best jokes are the little ones that pack so much wit into such a small package. How do you do that? Comedian Bill Kilpatrick examines the genius of the one-liner. He looks at what goes into these little comedic spitfires. He asks why people like them so much. He looks at who, in the comedy world, is known for the best one-liners. He also talks about tips and tricks. This is a book about how to build one-liners that do more with less.

In the midst of the Reagan 80s, a new convert gets sent on a Mormon mission but instead of seeing the world, he gets sent to Utah. There he discovers a world very different from anything he had imagined. Knock is the true story of Comedian Bill Kilpatrick's journey from faith to doubt to something in-between. Along the way, Bill meets the many faces of Mormonism amidst the many Mormon faces that end up on your doorstep. At times irreverent, at times poignant, Knock is the story of one man's search for meaning within the crowded airport terminal of organized religion. It's a challenge to those within the faith to be honest about life. It's also a challenge to those outside the faith to see the humanity engaged within a system that may not be your cup of tea - in a religion at war with tea. Read it on your Kindle, at your local Starbucks. Pull up a stool at your local bar. Sneak a peak of it from behind a pew (Sit behind the tall people). Knock isn't about religion. It's about people who inhabit a religious world. It's not about whether they're right or wrong. It's about what happens regardless, particularly if you thought you were going to France or Russia or South America - anywhere but Utah.

Comedian Bill Kilpatrick writes this open love letter to his wife, Sherri, who has been his muse and his mate for 32 years. He walks us through an odyssey that started in his childhood - with dreams of his wife - that culminated in a whirlwind romance. A born romantic, Bill popped the question on his fifth date in five days but it was Sherri who led the way as the two crossed a continent to find each other and build a home in Florida. Weathering hurricanes, tornadoes, death, hardships and career changes, these two found a way to stay together. This is a book for anyone who believes in the redemptive power of love and the soothing winterfresh taste of Bill's halfwit sense of humor. If you like good comedy, this is not the book for you. But if you like good love - because we all like good love - you can't afford not to read this book. This book will not cure every disease, but if you're suffering from a disease called loneliness, it will definitely point the way to better books. Four out of five dentists surveyed recommended this book to their patients who still read. If that's not a testimonial, I don't know what is because, to be honest, I really don't know what one is. This is a book for those believe that happiness is possible as well as for those who have enough money to buy it. If Deepak Chopra were here to talk about this book, he would probably wonder how he got here. I have it on good authority that Abraham Lincoln loved this book. In fact, it was the last book he read before deciding it was time to see a play. My dog has never read this book but I watched him as I was writing it and he seemed to scratch less when I read him my favorite parts. This book could literally change your outlook on whether you buy any more books without asking someone who has read it first. This is a great book to read in the bathroom as long as you don't read it in the shower. This book will not cause tooth decay unless you use it to do the drinking game but with chocolate. No animals were harmed in the making of this book unless you consider wood pulp an animal. It should be noted, however, that Bill shaved before writing this book, so some animals were affected. It is not recommended that you read this book while riding a roller coaster. It is also not recommended that you bring this book with you into a cage full of lions, tigers or bears (oh my). No part of this book contains asbestos or cocaine residue. This book is not illegal in Tajikistan. No assembly is required. Batteries are not included, nor are they recommended. This book will probably not disturb some viewers. Okay, maybe it will disturb some viewers. Use only as directed. See a doctor if itching persists more than six months. This book is not available on Mars. If you are in a marching band, some assembly is obviously required. This book will not tell you who to vote for president, as long as you weren't pulling for Newt Gingrich. The FDA has not made any recommendations regarding this book. If you find a woman like Sherri, marry her. Void where prohibited. Also, prohibited where void. Warning: This book is flammable if tossed into an open flame. Not recommended as a substitute for toilet paper. May cause drowsiness. Not actual size. Your mileage may vary. If this book makes you think, see a teacher. This book is sold as-is. Do not try this at home. Do not try this at work. Do not try this at church. Do not try this during jury selection. Some details apply. Actually, all details apply. This book was not filmed before a studio audience. No celebrity impersonators were used. None of the statements in this book should be taken at face value. If plastic straws are outlawed, only outlaws will have plastic straws. Some people are dumber than they look. Electricity turns me on. Your chances of liking this book are greater than your chances of winning the lottery, but only marginally. Ducks are dinosaurs without museums.

Comedian Bill Kilpatrick looks at "clean comedy" and talks about why comics do it, why they fear it, why they're not always that good at it, and wonders how comics could be better at it. He goes into detail about what clean comedy is, why the term is not as clear as you might think, and why it matters. He talks about why it's a good idea to write clean and why it's important to perform clean if you've accepted an offer to work clean. He lists variety of strategies comics can use in cleaning up material. He also discusses his own approach to working clean and how he thinks his approach is the better way.

In a world awash in books on stand-up, comedian Bill Kilpatrick goes back to Sun Tzu, the ancient Chinese militarist. Adapting Sun Tzu's Art of War to comedy, Bill Kilpatrick looks for insights comics can use to win their own battles onstage. Sun Tzu and the Art of Stand-Up is a reminder that some of the best advice is older than you think. Sun Tzu's timeless insights prove to be invaluable for comedians looking to rethink the art of stand-up.

Comedian Bill Kilpatrick discusses comedic storytelling, as a format in stand-up, and why it is quite possibly the best way to do stand-up. He discusses the relationship between storytelling, one-liners and observational humor - what they have in common and how storytelling is different. He also goes into detail about how to tell better stories.

Christianity has lost a lot of credibility in the modern age. Everything - from carnival-hustler preachers to merchandising to real estate schemes and communications empires - has turned the basic teachings of Jesus into a total circus. An increasing number of people have turned against religion for exactly this reason.Comedian Bill Kilpatrick examines the Christian faith from another perspective. Instead of focusing on what Christians should believe, Bill asks what Christians should do. Taking the Sermon on the Mount as his guide, Bill looks at the fundamental principles of a Christian lifestyle. Can we get back to basics? What kind of life do these teachings ask of us?Looking at Christians as "doers of the word and not hearers only," Bill talks about what Christianity has to offer a world without religion. Could Christianity be practiced even by the non-religious and if so, what would it look like?

Comedian Bill Kilpatrick talks about topical humor - what it is, how it works, why comics are drawn to it, why it's harder than it looks and how to write it better. The go-to style of late-night talkshows, topical humor lets us laugh at the day's headlines. For many people, it's their "news and commentary." But topical humor is also a potential quagmire for comics trying to build a set and develop their own voice. If you do topical, there are do's and don'ts to keep in mind. This book examines how topical can be misleading as well as how to avoid the trap of just being another comic talking about the same story and writing the same joke as 23 million wannabes on Twitter.

Everybody told Leona Bilbrey she looked just like Marilyn Monroe... everybody. And ever since last summer when she got those MM initials tattooed on her rear she had felt it was in the stars that she would be the next Marilyn Monroe. There was only a couple of small problems that had her held back. For one thing, she lived in Muskogee, Oklahoma and it was a good fifteen hundred miles from Hollywood. The other small problem she had was that she had no money. None. But those were minor things as far as she was concerned. She just knew somehow, someway she was going to be the next Marilyn Monroe. She just didn't know how.

After a trip home for the Fourth of July, Joe Smith and his two brothers are on their way back to their construction jobs in Roswell, New Mexico when they run out of gas on a seldom-used oil lease road. The night is pitch-black. They get out of Joe's new 1947 Ford and start walking. They want to find some gasoline or a telephone. Instead they find the adventure of a life time.

A charming narrative of a boy's relationship with his adored, occasionally impatient, and always forgiving father, Brassies, Mashies, and Bootleg Scotch takes us to some of the most notable golf clubs in America and introduces us to a delightful cast of characters, from giants of golf history to behind-the-scenes eccentrics to walk-on stars like New York Giants pitcher Hal Schumacher.